Tuesday, November 8, 2011
To Look to a better day...
What is it to look to a better day?
To not see what there is right now.
There is a sky full of stars, some are firsts of anything, as one dies another is born out of the gases left...behind
Crappy start I would think, to be something that was just left over, and discarded.
In the eyes of the lost there is a new begining and hope, but when some one is found they think they have the key, and what is it with out being shared, if you keep it to your self it will be all bust lost again..
For you have lost the look of need, and have found what others have lost.
So I tell you the key before I lose it, To for something that is not what you are finding, you have to look as if you are not there.
To see what is there, you have to stand in the silence, and look again, even if you have to make it silent..
You have to be still to see it..its there..just past where you just looked..keep looking, see the sparkle ? there it is..now go and share it...
To not see what there is right now.
There is a sky full of stars, some are firsts of anything, as one dies another is born out of the gases left...behind
Crappy start I would think, to be something that was just left over, and discarded.
In the eyes of the lost there is a new begining and hope, but when some one is found they think they have the key, and what is it with out being shared, if you keep it to your self it will be all bust lost again..
For you have lost the look of need, and have found what others have lost.
So I tell you the key before I lose it, To for something that is not what you are finding, you have to look as if you are not there.
To see what is there, you have to stand in the silence, and look again, even if you have to make it silent..
You have to be still to see it..its there..just past where you just looked..keep looking, see the sparkle ? there it is..now go and share it...
Tuesday, September 13, 2011
His tears
His eyes fill with tears and he screams out loud, he dose not understand. Why he is forgotten, why the calls are never answered, why he tries so much to be heard.
What is it to every one but those that know him, its acting out, but I see him and will not leave him, for I understand him, and will for ever be there. Even when he screams things he never means, even when the world tells him he alone, I will be here.
What is it to every one but those that know him, its acting out, but I see him and will not leave him, for I understand him, and will for ever be there. Even when he screams things he never means, even when the world tells him he alone, I will be here.
Sunday, July 31, 2011
What I have learned
I am going on a journey...
With out leaving and where..
Where am I going..
I am Going to find my self..
Well you are right there...
I am going far a way ...
Why must you leave...???
I am not leaving...
Where is it that you are going than..???
I am going to Center...To find what no one else can see ..
To go to a place that only God Can Go...
What will you find there??
I will find ME..
But you are right here...
( the logic of a child..and the logic of an Adult...see how we age.....when we where young we never had to leave to find ourselves..but we never knew more than the fact were...here....just here..)
If you want details...well...life will show you them..
With out leaving and where..
Where am I going..
I am Going to find my self..
Well you are right there...
I am going far a way ...
Why must you leave...???
I am not leaving...
Where is it that you are going than..???
I am going to Center...To find what no one else can see ..
To go to a place that only God Can Go...
What will you find there??
I will find ME..
But you are right here...
( the logic of a child..and the logic of an Adult...see how we age.....when we where young we never had to leave to find ourselves..but we never knew more than the fact were...here....just here..)
If you want details...well...life will show you them..
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
Breaking..
One can not break that is merly bending..
There is nothing one can not handle that is not formed from pain...
That you can not master, is the inside stronger or weaker... Than take what you have an accept it..
This may mean you change it later and deal now with the inside and not the outside..
Because the outside slowly fades away and what you are left with is what you have become...
Have you weakened and broken when you should have just bent...
Have you given in to things just for now...That scar you...now and forever...
Has this changed you, or have you let it change you...
Can you bend or will you break...and what is the point where you will take the pain of bending over quick death of breaking...
Death of what you ask...death of your self... death of what you are in side...to become some mold of the right person...the cute sexy , stick that can't look you in the eye because she dose not know who she is...
Or are you going to be the woman that knows who she is not because of what some one else says but because she has gone through the hell and had her God with her, and to hell with what others say, there is no need to break your self to be with this world, when you can bend and go through pain with God, knowing that he will be there at the end...and the world will leave you once you break...
What good are you to them once you are just like them.??? They have no use for mirrors...mirrors make you see things they see...a friend taught me its not the mirror I am looking at...its inside of you...
So let Your self bend... and be you or break and be what they want.....
There is nothing one can not handle that is not formed from pain...
That you can not master, is the inside stronger or weaker... Than take what you have an accept it..
This may mean you change it later and deal now with the inside and not the outside..
Because the outside slowly fades away and what you are left with is what you have become...
Have you weakened and broken when you should have just bent...
Have you given in to things just for now...That scar you...now and forever...
Has this changed you, or have you let it change you...
Can you bend or will you break...and what is the point where you will take the pain of bending over quick death of breaking...
Death of what you ask...death of your self... death of what you are in side...to become some mold of the right person...the cute sexy , stick that can't look you in the eye because she dose not know who she is...
Or are you going to be the woman that knows who she is not because of what some one else says but because she has gone through the hell and had her God with her, and to hell with what others say, there is no need to break your self to be with this world, when you can bend and go through pain with God, knowing that he will be there at the end...and the world will leave you once you break...
What good are you to them once you are just like them.??? They have no use for mirrors...mirrors make you see things they see...a friend taught me its not the mirror I am looking at...its inside of you...
So let Your self bend... and be you or break and be what they want.....
Sunday, July 24, 2011
Who Am I
You look at me like am Diffrent an I tell you - I am
I was never made to stand in the crowd and not stand out, I was once there, and sometimes I am there again.
I am not the crowd, the crowd feeds only what they want you to eat.. they tell you what you want to hear. Not what you need.
They will feed you when you are cool with them.
They will not when you show them change.
I am not here for them I am here for something greater than me.
All the crowd wants is now, and dose not know that there is something greater..
God you have blessed me with greater, the crowd tells me tales and reasons with me to change...
To go their way, but you show me something greater,That is in me.
I was never made to stand in the crowd and not stand out, I was once there, and sometimes I am there again.
I am not the crowd, the crowd feeds only what they want you to eat.. they tell you what you want to hear. Not what you need.
They will feed you when you are cool with them.
They will not when you show them change.
I am not here for them I am here for something greater than me.
All the crowd wants is now, and dose not know that there is something greater..
God you have blessed me with greater, the crowd tells me tales and reasons with me to change...
To go their way, but you show me something greater,That is in me.
Words
There used to be a time where every- thing would hurt
An there used to be a time --- where nothing I could say ever mattered...but now...Father you've given me back my words..
I used to think that what they said mattered so much - i put my words on a shelf and hid them a way but today Lord... I have found them...
And here --- I stand looking in to forever with you....
And here L O R D am I what was lost is found... for here am I ...Oh lord...Here am...
An there used to be a time --- where nothing I could say ever mattered...but now...Father you've given me back my words..
I used to think that what they said mattered so much - i put my words on a shelf and hid them a way but today Lord... I have found them...
And here --- I stand looking in to forever with you....
And here L O R D am I what was lost is found... for here am I ...Oh lord...Here am...
Saturday, July 23, 2011
They want.....
They want me to be bitter...
They want me to be sad....
They want me to shutter...
They want me me to be like them..
They want me to conform..
They want me to be like them....
But my God did not make me like them..
He did not get me over this mountain just to fall I the gully...
He came in the darkest of my hours when no one would help..not one would answer..
When every one sad I will help you out... and when you need them where did they go..
This is what they wanted me to stay sad..
They wanted a reason to show sympathy .... and say oh look she is never going to get over what happened...you know what happened( because they where there...just didn't see them)
Because it gives them something to talk about...well here we go... God lets give them something to talk about:)
Because I aint the one they want....lol
http://youtu.be/w7FasupDizg
They want me to be sad....
They want me to shutter...
They want me me to be like them..
They want me to conform..
They want me to be like them....
But my God did not make me like them..
He did not get me over this mountain just to fall I the gully...
He came in the darkest of my hours when no one would help..not one would answer..
When every one sad I will help you out... and when you need them where did they go..
This is what they wanted me to stay sad..
They wanted a reason to show sympathy .... and say oh look she is never going to get over what happened...you know what happened( because they where there...just didn't see them)
Because it gives them something to talk about...well here we go... God lets give them something to talk about:)
Because I aint the one they want....lol
http://youtu.be/w7FasupDizg
Love needed...
So they tell me it is a man I need...
I tell them I have my God, and my father and my son...and a dog...all of which are more loyal.
Than a man.
They tell me I need to have faith in a man..
I tell them I do one has died for me the other saves me and one will soon be one I will do all the above for..
and the dog well he would be loyal til death for us all..
I ask can you find me one of those..
She looks at me and says...no but can you share yours..
I tell you this :
A man that dose not know this man in my life, is not a man it is a boy, he still wants to be taken care of..knowing he should be the one taking care of us...
This man you talk about would never replace my first love, only add to the fact that I am loved, he would not ask me to change, from this love I have had first. To put away the idea of another man out side of him.
In stead he would follow and one day lead, if he did not understand at first he would become the man I am looking for, But know only that God comes first and family. And that there would be no changing this, for when he becomes the center and everything has to be his way and not god's than things become oil and water, something it never meant to be..
So I tell you this If I need a man- I will have my man bring him to me, for that is what he said he would do...A man will leave his father and mother and cling to his wife, not that the wife would leave all she knows to raise a man...Because When God blesses a union there is not one or any that will stand hell to tear it apart. because what he joins all hell wont be able to tear apart..
She looked at me, and shook her head..so this is the man you are waiting for...
I told her no...
This is the man that is waiting for me, for when God shows him, than he will find, and leave all for me. My search is over, and when it started it was so. Because its never me to find him..it is him who finds me..
http://youtu.be/HHlZGeLeTUY
I tell them I have my God, and my father and my son...and a dog...all of which are more loyal.
Than a man.
They tell me I need to have faith in a man..
I tell them I do one has died for me the other saves me and one will soon be one I will do all the above for..
and the dog well he would be loyal til death for us all..
I ask can you find me one of those..
She looks at me and says...no but can you share yours..
I tell you this :
A man that dose not know this man in my life, is not a man it is a boy, he still wants to be taken care of..knowing he should be the one taking care of us...
This man you talk about would never replace my first love, only add to the fact that I am loved, he would not ask me to change, from this love I have had first. To put away the idea of another man out side of him.
In stead he would follow and one day lead, if he did not understand at first he would become the man I am looking for, But know only that God comes first and family. And that there would be no changing this, for when he becomes the center and everything has to be his way and not god's than things become oil and water, something it never meant to be..
So I tell you this If I need a man- I will have my man bring him to me, for that is what he said he would do...A man will leave his father and mother and cling to his wife, not that the wife would leave all she knows to raise a man...Because When God blesses a union there is not one or any that will stand hell to tear it apart. because what he joins all hell wont be able to tear apart..
She looked at me, and shook her head..so this is the man you are waiting for...
I told her no...
This is the man that is waiting for me, for when God shows him, than he will find, and leave all for me. My search is over, and when it started it was so. Because its never me to find him..it is him who finds me..
http://youtu.be/HHlZGeLeTUY
Friday, July 22, 2011
His love
Funny when I wana cry....dance when I wana be sad...smile for no reason..
Finds me when I hide, says there is more in me than in the mirror...says that forever is never long enough..
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LjhCEhWiKXk
He believes in me when others say I should change..he says if i want to ... never have to...would rather I not..
There is a look in his eyes that says he means his words...there is a place I never thought I would find, when you are never looking when you stop searching you find it...
His love...xoxoxoxoxo
Finds me when I hide, says there is more in me than in the mirror...says that forever is never long enough..
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LjhCEhWiKXk
He believes in me when others say I should change..he says if i want to ... never have to...would rather I not..
There is a look in his eyes that says he means his words...there is a place I never thought I would find, when you are never looking when you stop searching you find it...
His love...xoxoxoxoxo
Love
What is this thorn in my side you have given me? It is a memory to carry with me always, of a love that never was.
What is this pain I fell when I think of trust and love again? The lesson you taught be about love
Sad is the day that I recall the memories, the fear that took me, the forgiveness that washes it a way…
I will forgive you love, but I will not forget, for to fool me once is your doing to fool me again, that is me…
So love remember the memories and know that I thank you for the lessons.
Wednesday, July 20, 2011
Past
What is letting go? What is forgiving but not forgetting??
It is peace the slow peace that comes when the storm has not yet passed, but you fell the start of the rain..you know it has to happen..it has to come for you to grow.
It has to flood to prove you can hold back the tides, that the nights have to be lonely, the days have to be filled with something other than tears..
You have to stand up, you have to place the rock or what was a way.
There is no rock to stand on if you don't
there is times you will sink, there are times you will be utterly alone.. but what is this?
This is the truth, you have to be alone to know the one father, the one man that will never hurt you or yours.
He is ever there, and you have to be alone to see that he will be the one holding back the rain when it floods, and he will shelter you from the flood.
You must know this that he will let it rain, he will let the floods come, he will not shelter you till you ask him to.
He will not interfere where he is not the center, he will not stand guard over something that is not fully his.
You have to ask him to take it from you, but know that it is on his time, not yours.
He will bless you with seasons where you will have all you need and never see it, there will be some where you will be happy as ever for no reason besides you have found the one that he has planed for you to find, but this is all on his time not yours.
So when you want to do things your way know that there is a better way. Know that God's way is the one sure way to have the best seasons of life ever, even if its in a storm, you can still find the will to dance. So bless you all. :)
It is peace the slow peace that comes when the storm has not yet passed, but you fell the start of the rain..you know it has to happen..it has to come for you to grow.
It has to flood to prove you can hold back the tides, that the nights have to be lonely, the days have to be filled with something other than tears..
You have to stand up, you have to place the rock or what was a way.
There is no rock to stand on if you don't
there is times you will sink, there are times you will be utterly alone.. but what is this?
This is the truth, you have to be alone to know the one father, the one man that will never hurt you or yours.
He is ever there, and you have to be alone to see that he will be the one holding back the rain when it floods, and he will shelter you from the flood.
You must know this that he will let it rain, he will let the floods come, he will not shelter you till you ask him to.
He will not interfere where he is not the center, he will not stand guard over something that is not fully his.
You have to ask him to take it from you, but know that it is on his time, not yours.
He will bless you with seasons where you will have all you need and never see it, there will be some where you will be happy as ever for no reason besides you have found the one that he has planed for you to find, but this is all on his time not yours.
So when you want to do things your way know that there is a better way. Know that God's way is the one sure way to have the best seasons of life ever, even if its in a storm, you can still find the will to dance. So bless you all. :)
Saturday, March 19, 2011
Reality of a vet…
What one man Destroys... is some one elses heart.... what on
man calls trash...another calls love and a blessing....what on man dose dosent
mean they all gunna do it....or so they tell me..... whats up with men??? its
one of those days... where i wana curl back in my blanket and ignore the
world...whats bad about it...whats good about it...but than i would have to
wash more ....cuz i wana break down....cry for a while....but whats that
do....it makes the man win...and no way in hell is he gunna win:) ....long
story short.....I dont like the man... used to stand with him but now he aint
standing with non of us that used to stand with him....so .....i wonder if he
knows how many hes getting to stand against him...not standing for
them.....hum...
man calls trash...another calls love and a blessing....what on man dose dosent
mean they all gunna do it....or so they tell me..... whats up with men??? its
one of those days... where i wana curl back in my blanket and ignore the
world...whats bad about it...whats good about it...but than i would have to
wash more ....cuz i wana break down....cry for a while....but whats that
do....it makes the man win...and no way in hell is he gunna win:) ....long
story short.....I dont like the man... used to stand with him but now he aint
standing with non of us that used to stand with him....so .....i wonder if he
knows how many hes getting to stand against him...not standing for
them.....hum...
whats with men....think before you say oh thank you for all
you have done...now about all the time you gave and the pain...well thanks but
i dont see how i owe you anything....night mares...attacked? beaten? dont see
it.....must not have happened...its in paper...on paper....well we can help you
in a few months...knee pain why? .....oh it was cut open
....busted...smashed.... you have papers to show it.....um we will look in to
it and see if they where true....oh you have 8 docs telling you not to
run....and mris.....well we will do our own tests....
you have done...now about all the time you gave and the pain...well thanks but
i dont see how i owe you anything....night mares...attacked? beaten? dont see
it.....must not have happened...its in paper...on paper....well we can help you
in a few months...knee pain why? .....oh it was cut open
....busted...smashed.... you have papers to show it.....um we will look in to
it and see if they where true....oh you have 8 docs telling you not to
run....and mris.....well we will do our own tests....
The man thinks we are dumb...
Oh you saved all the records....xrays....
and it did get worse with service....it was great
befor....you ran track....
befor....you ran track....
oh you didnt have night mares before.....you where attacked
by your own?? really why??? oh 15mns around men not a good idea for women ???
why? really can you give your opinon on women in battle??? oh its not the women
to worry about?? how do you stand by that.... is that a fact?? we have no proof
that men attack their own ...
by your own?? really why??? oh 15mns around men not a good idea for women ???
why? really can you give your opinon on women in battle??? oh its not the women
to worry about?? how do you stand by that.... is that a fact?? we have no proof
that men attack their own ...
Maybe men change.....but the man never dose.....
still thinks men are angels...
If you dont get ask... and if its to personal or to pissing
you off its the truth about the man...he wants to side step and not care about
what happens to people who stand up with him in hard times...and after hes let
them go...well he didnt do it.... didnt see it happen
you off its the truth about the man...he wants to side step and not care about
what happens to people who stand up with him in hard times...and after hes let
them go...well he didnt do it.... didnt see it happen
and dosent know why i would have night mares about something
that i tried ot handle my own....deal with it all...like iwas taught to ....
and i have...some times i wish i didnt have such a heart....
that i tried ot handle my own....deal with it all...like iwas taught to ....
and i have...some times i wish i didnt have such a heart....
maybe one day a man will prove me wrong...but til than....
sorry if i ofend....i gues... but i fought long enough to
protect your freedom....you can suck it up and drive on...because if you dont
have the skin to know what we are dealing with in a war...and come home to
fight again to just try to get help....you would think some one out there would
care....
protect your freedom....you can suck it up and drive on...because if you dont
have the skin to know what we are dealing with in a war...and come home to
fight again to just try to get help....you would think some one out there would
care....
and not just pretend.....we support our troops long as they
are troops.....Vietnam again...
are troops.....Vietnam again...
its like taking a dog to a shelter because hes apain.... i
done that...because it was best for him to go where he could rest from the life
he had....been beaten and abused...he was hurt and he wanted to hurt some one
else....but that becomes his shelter when some vets are no longer troops they
have no shelter and most are homeless what happens than…they seek help…but many
never help them..and many turn them away….no knowing what they have been through
to the man he would rather send us all to the pound….
done that...because it was best for him to go where he could rest from the life
he had....been beaten and abused...he was hurt and he wanted to hurt some one
else....but that becomes his shelter when some vets are no longer troops they
have no shelter and most are homeless what happens than…they seek help…but many
never help them..and many turn them away….no knowing what they have been through
to the man he would rather send us all to the pound….
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
Love in time
Learning again is hard…
To put trust in any one…
To trust they will never place your love in danger…
To place the most valuable thing in your life in their hands…
Calls for more than you may ever know…
When the trust of love has broken down…
There Is not a way to believe again …
Or is there? ?
I know that time heals all wounds or so they say…
But how long does the memory last…
When is it that you see a thing that reminds you…
I have eyes looking back at me that remind me…
Why they ask me …
All I have to tell them is all will be well
God will see us through, everything will work out we will have each other…
No matter what material things we have to give up, we are forever together…
Love will come one day and we all will be ok, regardless…
Our love will never go anywhere…
Our will stay, forever..
No more pain, though we don't see tomorrow we have today…
Love will come and love will stay and if it doesn't than it was never love any way…
No matter how many colors you try to color it if poop is purple it's still stinks…
Just looks prettier on the outside… but in side…well its….poop..
No matter – love is love . . .
Love will be here forever…
Sunday, February 6, 2011
School
When I was younger I never thought that I would want to go back to school so much…
But times have shown me that I can help out so many people if I do, so many have been in my shoes..
With few people to understand them when they come home, so this is my plan…
I am going back to school( started ) and going to do my BS in Psychology and then I am going to move on to
My Masters in psychology and then on to my counseling licensing and going to be a help in some way to the same families that mine was , and still is
Prior military, with knowledge of long times apart and quick coming home and moving out again…
So many people don't get where they are and how it's hard to adjust things like that. . .
Most people think its supposed to come normal to a Soldier, but in most cases its taught over time, and it's all self-taught…
Its something you have to learn on your own there is no one that really gets in your very shoes…lots will say they know…but no one really knows…
Bless everyone's path as they travel- Cat out….
Saturday, February 5, 2011
Weight Re-Start
So Tomorrow is a new start for a lot of things and one is a Diet -
Things right now have been hard; I've become used to things the way they were...
But things are changing and I would like to change with them-
At first this Diet idea wasn't really mine, but after tonight I have been thinking,
And looking at old pictures of me and now, a lot has changed...
But there are something's I need to change along with it. For better
I think that it would help in the long run, so I have started this plan and
Journey hoping that I can regain some of my esteem from the year's journey…
Whatever has past let is such pass… Whatever is to come let it come gracefully…
With God's dear blessings I hope, to all of you, whoever read this…
And join me on this Long road…Towards health and possible new beginning's
For a Better year, a better life for all.
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
With it all
Because of Him....
Life Now
When you think that things are worse, they get that way…
And when you want them to get better…they take a long time to get that way...
Why is it that I think that things can change and why is it that I am so confused?
What is it that life thinks it can keep taking and never giving back to me? When broke is never
Broken enough for anyone to look twice and help…
When is enough to much for one person?
How do you explain broke to a child when they have faith that everything is theirs?
How I need my faith to be like a child's, God you see me through and when I always fear the worst you show me a brighter day…
Today it's cold but it's also warm, we have a house and food, and each other. Some people don't
Why is it that we can never see what we have outside of seeing what it is we don't?
I could only have the faith like a child. God I would be blessed and the richest ever.
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
Love
Wednesday, January 26, 2011
He Didn't Remember...
He thought that it was only himself he would hurt, by sitting alone and constantly ignoring life around him. Than one day He failed to notice the lock on the door, it was off. What did he forget, did he leave something out side? No, It came to him his child.
His child had run out side while he was resting. Where had she gone? Did her brother follow her, and where was he? There was no telling how long he was asleep, he started to look frantically searching. What had he been thinking? Why had this happened...again?? What was going to happen now?
There he was tearing through the house finding his clothes, wondering what he had done...he got a knock on the door it was them. He didn't see how they had remembered where they lived , but they did. Some how they had gotten some one to take them home...but what happens now?
He didn't know what he was supposed to do. This was the second time that he remembered.Why had things gotten like this? What caused him to not care? Did he care? He didn't really remember... He had been stuck at home so long that it was starting to get to him. He was numb to things that he shouldn't have been..He thought things where so mundane that it didn't really matter. .But wasn't it supposed to. This was after all his flesh and blood, some where in him he loved them...
He just didn't remember..
He didn't remember the door lock...or did they climb up and get it...? He wouldn't know...He was sleeping...
He was Neglecting the ones he loved the most, for what ? ?
He just didn't Remember....
His child had run out side while he was resting. Where had she gone? Did her brother follow her, and where was he? There was no telling how long he was asleep, he started to look frantically searching. What had he been thinking? Why had this happened...again?? What was going to happen now?
There he was tearing through the house finding his clothes, wondering what he had done...he got a knock on the door it was them. He didn't see how they had remembered where they lived , but they did. Some how they had gotten some one to take them home...but what happens now?
He didn't know what he was supposed to do. This was the second time that he remembered.Why had things gotten like this? What caused him to not care? Did he care? He didn't really remember... He had been stuck at home so long that it was starting to get to him. He was numb to things that he shouldn't have been..He thought things where so mundane that it didn't really matter. .But wasn't it supposed to. This was after all his flesh and blood, some where in him he loved them...
He just didn't remember..
He didn't remember the door lock...or did they climb up and get it...? He wouldn't know...He was sleeping...
He was Neglecting the ones he loved the most, for what ? ?
He just didn't Remember....
Sunday, January 23, 2011
Pride
What is it that moves some one before they fall on their face, and see they can't make it alone....
Pride...
What is it that hold them back from taking in the words of friends and family when they think they know better....
Pride...
What is it that causes them to never accept a hand when they fall down so low all they see is the sand??
Pride....
But what can they let go of to get all the things they lost back??
Pride...
When it is that we admit we can not do it alone that is when we WIN- Because God can come and carry us in his ...
Pride we are strong -
In him alone can we walk
Once we hit the lowest of the low...and we want to sink...
What other way is there...
As a dear friend told me....You can sit in the Dam hole...or you can get off your ass and climb Out....
I chose to reach out - I know my stubborn pride will hold me down and has before...
But it ain't about me...
It stooped being about me along time ago...Pride holds strong when you have worked to be proud and you have to learn all over again...there is different kind of pride...and ain't your own...That's a hard rock to break, but I've been trying to break it alone....and the funny thing is ....I am never alone..:) No matter how many people turn from me seems certain ones never turn, though I thought they held things against me, They learned something I am still learning , let it go...the past....
My stubborn Pride.....
Pride...
What is it that hold them back from taking in the words of friends and family when they think they know better....
Pride...
What is it that causes them to never accept a hand when they fall down so low all they see is the sand??
Pride....
But what can they let go of to get all the things they lost back??
Pride...
When it is that we admit we can not do it alone that is when we WIN- Because God can come and carry us in his ...
Pride we are strong -
In him alone can we walk
Once we hit the lowest of the low...and we want to sink...
What other way is there...
As a dear friend told me....You can sit in the Dam hole...or you can get off your ass and climb Out....
I chose to reach out - I know my stubborn pride will hold me down and has before...
But it ain't about me...
It stooped being about me along time ago...Pride holds strong when you have worked to be proud and you have to learn all over again...there is different kind of pride...and ain't your own...That's a hard rock to break, but I've been trying to break it alone....and the funny thing is ....I am never alone..:) No matter how many people turn from me seems certain ones never turn, though I thought they held things against me, They learned something I am still learning , let it go...the past....
My stubborn Pride.....
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
What is Change
The wind chills me to the core, I can't see my hand in front of my face. The dust settles and I see in front of me a bright blue sky..this place they have condemned as a sand box, has one thing that now where else has...fresh blue sky once the dust settles... The hate that poor out here, runs just like the blood that has time and time covered the ground we walk on. We can't see what they fought for here. We can't hear the liberty and the freedom they gave for the few, now the few are marching against us. The are shedding the true colors for what ever is suitable for the time... the ones we fought for are taking more and more for them selves..Forgetting the fact that those ones they forget are the ones that bleed and die, so the richer can get richer of the flesh of the poor. What price is paid they care not, but once they realize that the poor are the ones that fight their wars, who protect their liberty and freedom.
But they think that these things are free..free for them they have no price to pay.. they change their coat for what ever fits them, even if its a red coat...and they trade their colors for money...What are they all changing for...What are we all dieing for...Freedom Liberty ...of a Nation Under God.. We took God out...we threw him out of everything... now he looks on us and those that change their colors, One day he says we will only wear one color, either his or hells...wounder what price they will pay than??
When its over ther will be no Chance to change- I pray they pick the right colors. God Bless our Country, our fighting heros and our loves at home...Protect them all Even those who can not pick the colors...they serve.....Lord I chose to serve you, Lord, my father, Amen
But they think that these things are free..free for them they have no price to pay.. they change their coat for what ever fits them, even if its a red coat...and they trade their colors for money...What are they all changing for...What are we all dieing for...Freedom Liberty ...of a Nation Under God.. We took God out...we threw him out of everything... now he looks on us and those that change their colors, One day he says we will only wear one color, either his or hells...wounder what price they will pay than??
When its over ther will be no Chance to change- I pray they pick the right colors. God Bless our Country, our fighting heros and our loves at home...Protect them all Even those who can not pick the colors...they serve.....Lord I chose to serve you, Lord, my father, Amen
Her Tears -Abuse
Her tears poor down her face as she sees her father yell, her mother shakes in fear. She has seen them fight so much that she is scared that her mother will leave her. How fearful she is of her father, is this how she is to grow up? She thinks and she hopes in the corner where they can not see her.What if it wasn't like this? Is this all her fault? What if she wasn't there to cause problems between them? Seems all they do is fight now. She will remember this moment for ever..though she prays to forget.And one day there may be a chance that she will carry this on to her family, because this is what she knows, and thinks is normal. She will think this is how a man is to be to a woman, because her mother never stopped it, or couldn't. She will subconsciously go about and find the same path her mother found. It's a Cycle..
This is how most children grow up, crouched in the corner hearing their mother and father fight and sometimes it turns worse. They will never for get this time in their lives. They may even go on the same path later in life. We can make it better for them, if we let others know how to break the cycle.
This is how most children grow up, crouched in the corner hearing their mother and father fight and sometimes it turns worse. They will never for get this time in their lives. They may even go on the same path later in life. We can make it better for them, if we let others know how to break the cycle.
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
Books
THis is a story about people taking what dosen't belong to them and takes from those who worked hard to bring things to life and never again some times can bring such things to life again...things are free but at what really price??
“Free” Books Aren’t Free
“Free” Books Aren’t Free
Monday, January 10, 2011
New Day
This is a new day, one where there are many changes and might be grand changes..what is to come only God can tell and how I wish some times he would tell...but what would the fun be in knowing what is to come...and whats to say it wouldn't change the out come...or would it...maybe that's what he is an all knowing and powerful God because hes smart enough not to let on to us what is to come...Cuz even when he warns us we still find a way to mess it up...see future for the truth in this statement..
c 2011
c 2011
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)